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Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive

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The author of Self-Compassion follows up her groundbreaking book with new ideas that expand our notion of self-kindness and its capacity to transform our lives, showing women how to balance tender self-acceptance with fierce action to claim their power and change the world. Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compass The author of Self-Compassion follows up her groundbreaking book with new ideas that expand our notion of self-kindness and its capacity to transform our lives, showing women how to balance tender self-acceptance with fierce action to claim their power and change the world. Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compassion. Now, ten years and many studies later, she expands her body of work to explore a brand-new take on self-compassion. Although kindness and self-acceptance allow us to be with ourselves as we are, in all our glorious imperfection, the desire to alleviate suffering at the heart of this mindset isn't always gentle, sometimes it's fierce. We must also act courageously in order to protect ourselves from harm and injustice, say no to others so we can meet our own needs, and motivate necessary change in ourselves and society. Gender roles demand that women be soft and nurturing, not angry or powerful. But like yin and yang, the energies of fierce and tender self-compassion must be balanced for wholeness and wellbeing. Drawing on a wealth of research, her personal life story and empirically supported practices, Neff demonstrates how women can use fierce and tender self-compassion to succeed in the workplace, engage in caregiving without burning out, be authentic in relationships, and end the silence around sexual harassment and abuse. Most women intuitively recognize fierceness as part of their true nature, but have been discouraged from developing it. Women must reclaim their power in order to create a healthier society and find lasting happiness. In this wise, caring, and enlightening book, Neff shows women how to reclaim balance within themselves, so they can help restore balance in the world.


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The author of Self-Compassion follows up her groundbreaking book with new ideas that expand our notion of self-kindness and its capacity to transform our lives, showing women how to balance tender self-acceptance with fierce action to claim their power and change the world. Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compass The author of Self-Compassion follows up her groundbreaking book with new ideas that expand our notion of self-kindness and its capacity to transform our lives, showing women how to balance tender self-acceptance with fierce action to claim their power and change the world. Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compassion. Now, ten years and many studies later, she expands her body of work to explore a brand-new take on self-compassion. Although kindness and self-acceptance allow us to be with ourselves as we are, in all our glorious imperfection, the desire to alleviate suffering at the heart of this mindset isn't always gentle, sometimes it's fierce. We must also act courageously in order to protect ourselves from harm and injustice, say no to others so we can meet our own needs, and motivate necessary change in ourselves and society. Gender roles demand that women be soft and nurturing, not angry or powerful. But like yin and yang, the energies of fierce and tender self-compassion must be balanced for wholeness and wellbeing. Drawing on a wealth of research, her personal life story and empirically supported practices, Neff demonstrates how women can use fierce and tender self-compassion to succeed in the workplace, engage in caregiving without burning out, be authentic in relationships, and end the silence around sexual harassment and abuse. Most women intuitively recognize fierceness as part of their true nature, but have been discouraged from developing it. Women must reclaim their power in order to create a healthier society and find lasting happiness. In this wise, caring, and enlightening book, Neff shows women how to reclaim balance within themselves, so they can help restore balance in the world.

30 review for Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive

  1. 4 out of 5

    Jennifer Louden

    this is such an important book! Check out my interview with Kristen on June 15th on my podcast Create out Loud, wherever you listen to your podcasts!

  2. 4 out of 5

    Howard

    Beautifully done book. Like I said before, both men and women should read this. Its required reading if you work, care for a sick or elderly person, ... actually if you're alive! Her exercises make you think, in a real way. I love her work. The way she was treated by her alma mater made me sweat with rage. That part reminds me of the Jim Crow south in the US. She started her Mindful Self-Compassion organization to help people, and that didn't count to get tenure? Gimme a break! As a society, we Beautifully done book. Like I said before, both men and women should read this. Its required reading if you work, care for a sick or elderly person, ... actually if you're alive! Her exercises make you think, in a real way. I love her work. The way she was treated by her alma mater made me sweat with rage. That part reminds me of the Jim Crow south in the US. She started her Mindful Self-Compassion organization to help people, and that didn't count to get tenure? Gimme a break! As a society, we can do so much better than holding women to these outdated painful standards. Besides, everyone needs self-compassion, just like Helena Roth's "Doing Gentle With an Edge" you can learn to treat yourself better, even when you make mistakes.

  3. 5 out of 5

    Nicole

    This book was POWERFUL and should be essential reading for everyone! Fierce Self-Compassion made me feel validated and seen, and it is a must-read for all women! And men, if they want to understand the struggles and journeys women go through, from gender roles, sexism, imposter syndrome and dismissal/disrespect in male-dominated workplaces, and the silence around sexual harassment and abuse. Note: None of this is anything I'm going through now, but I have been through multiple times, as many wome This book was POWERFUL and should be essential reading for everyone! Fierce Self-Compassion made me feel validated and seen, and it is a must-read for all women! And men, if they want to understand the struggles and journeys women go through, from gender roles, sexism, imposter syndrome and dismissal/disrespect in male-dominated workplaces, and the silence around sexual harassment and abuse. Note: None of this is anything I'm going through now, but I have been through multiple times, as many women have, and remain silent. This book felt so good for my soul to lift the weight of my post-traumatic thoughts and inner anger when events come back into mind. This book wasn't on my radar but showed up in the library. My first thought was that it might be flowery and simply about loving yourself. However, it went far above my expectations and goes through areas where women are commonly suffering. The book gives us concrete advice to help evaluate and bring out our inner voice to stand up for ourselves. It also provides easy-to-follow mindfulness practices to help us let go of self-criticism and not let anyone disrespect our boundaries.

  4. 5 out of 5

    Christy

    The yin and yang of compassion...this is a truly wise and helpful book for anyone hoping to find the balance.

  5. 5 out of 5

    Paula

    This is the 2nd book I've read by Neff. I originally read Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, which I thought was better. This one is geared for women and I found Part 1: Why Women Need Fierce Self-Compassion to be too political and too depressing. She clearly has a Democratic bias. Yes being female can have challenges but the way she talks about the problems makes us sound like victims and it's a bit too inaccurate for my liking. Men and women both have different life c This is the 2nd book I've read by Neff. I originally read Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, which I thought was better. This one is geared for women and I found Part 1: Why Women Need Fierce Self-Compassion to be too political and too depressing. She clearly has a Democratic bias. Yes being female can have challenges but the way she talks about the problems makes us sound like victims and it's a bit too inaccurate for my liking. Men and women both have different life challenges and I've heard many perspectives from both genders. Life is hard for most people so I just found it was trying to make women sound like they are helpless victims. This probably was not her intention but that's how it comes off. In other words, Part 1 was not objective. We've come a long way and that should be celebrated. There will always be ways that life can improve for females so why drag people down. Felt unempowering. I found Part II more interesting as it covers the techniques. I found Chapter 8 Becoming Our Best Selves to be the most interesting chapter from this book since it talks about how people think we need to be hard on ourselves to be successful. The evidence suggests that self compassion fosters a growth mindset which helps us to be more resilient and therefore more likely to achieve success.

  6. 5 out of 5

    Holly

    Feminist through and through, and well researched.

  7. 5 out of 5

    Jena

  8. 4 out of 5

    Claire Hall

  9. 5 out of 5

    Jessica

  10. 5 out of 5

    Carling

  11. 4 out of 5

    Jordana Confino

  12. 4 out of 5

    Maria James-Shier

  13. 5 out of 5

    Les

  14. 5 out of 5

    Leslie Baron

  15. 4 out of 5

    Nina Banks

  16. 5 out of 5

    Jen Tse

  17. 5 out of 5

    Vicky

  18. 5 out of 5

    Tricia Peralta

  19. 4 out of 5

    Sheila

  20. 4 out of 5

    Robyn Greenwood

  21. 4 out of 5

    Sarah

  22. 4 out of 5

    Jacqueline

  23. 4 out of 5

    Sandra

  24. 5 out of 5

    Nikki

  25. 5 out of 5

    Brandi

  26. 4 out of 5

    Sarah

  27. 4 out of 5

    Liz

  28. 5 out of 5

    Marguerite Pennington

  29. 4 out of 5

    Yordanka

  30. 5 out of 5

    Victor Cora Nazario

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